Couples Communication Counselling
With professional help couples CAN communicate better. We begin by identifying the habitual patterns of mutual hurt. Both partners play a role. Both need to identify the ways their interaction deteriorates.
Treating each other respectfully takes thought, self-control and practice. Words can be destructive and may never be forgotten. We may drift into addressing our loved-one in terms and tones we would never use with a stranger.
Therapy Helps
Careful listening is key. Responsive listening, especially reflection of feelings, is the most helpful. Try to put yourself in his or her place. Try to hear his or her history, hurts, scars. You might well think and act differently in similar circumstances. Even so, can you hear what makes him tick? Completely “getting it” is impossible. Trying counts for a lot.
At 905-937-4596 you can reserve an appointment to talk it through. We recommend an hour and a half, especially for your first appointment.
RESOURCES
- -After the Affair, or How Can I Forgive You (and sequels), by Janis Spring
- Crazy Time: Surviving Divorce . . . , by Abigail Trafford
- Divorce Busting, by Michelle Weiner-Davis
- Getting the Love You Want, by Harville Hendrix
- Hold Me Tight, by Sue Johnson
- Rebuilding: When Your Relationship Ends, by Bruce Fisher & Robert Alberti
- The Five Love Languages, by Gary Chapman
- The New Rules of Marriage, by Terrence Real
- The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, by Gottman and Silver
- Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay, by Mira Kirshenbaum
- The High Conflict Couple, by Alan Fruzzetti and Marsha Linehan
- Infidelity, Esther Perel: rethinking infidelity. . . a talk for anyone who has ever loved
- Weekend marriage workshops, interfaith church sponsored: retrouvaille.org
SEXUAL ISSUES:
- For Yourself, by Lonnie Barbach
- Passionate Marriage: Keeping Love & Intimacy Alive in Committed Relationships, by Dr. David Schnarch
- Sensate Focus: sensate-focus.pdf
- Long Relationships: Esther Perel: the secret to desire in a long term relationship
GENERAL RELATIONSHIPS:
- Controlling People, by Patricia Evans
- Coping with Difficult People, by Robert M. Bramson, Ph.D.
- The Dance of Anger: a Woman’s Guide to Changing…Intimate Relationships, by Harriet Lerner
- Women Who Love Too Much, by Robin Norwood
- Getting to Yes with Yourself, by William Ury









